Surviving college as a mom:)

Being a parent and attending college can be challenging but not impossible. I am a mother who is also a student at Orange Coast Community College here in Costa Mesa CA. I am majoring in Radiologic Technologist. I have many goals in life and one of them is to graduate with honors. As I just started my semester I wanted to provide a few pointers on what has been helping me throughout my journey.

  1. I take night classes since I know in a few months I’ll be heading back to work.
  2. I am also part time so I don’t stress our too much .
  3. I make sure throughout my day I have a healthy meal to keep me energized and drink plenty of fluids.
  4. I maintain organized and make sure I have a routine.
  5. Time management is a must.
  6.  Start small….ONLY do what you can handle, so you’re not dropping classes because you got too much going on.
  7. Study while you can. I know having kids the house is always noisy so. I try to study between my kids nap times and at night. TIP!! I sometimes take them to the library where my toddler sits down and looks at books and tries to read them. TIP!! You can also study at the library at school which some of them have tutors that can help with your homework 🙂
  8. Colleges/Universities offer childcare based on your income, if you’re a parent who is struggling financially chances are you might even get FREE childcare on campus.
  9. Communicate with your counselor and make sure he or she understands your goals and provides the advice you need to be successful in school. 
  10. DON’T GIVE UP ON YOURSELF because you’re not the only parent on campus 🙂

POSHMARK APP Fashion Sell/Buy (Invite Code GCSFJ)Posh2wear

Good Morning I wanted to share a side gig I currently have that’s called PostMark. PoshMark is an app where you can sell and buy fashion items from your own closet. It’s pretty simple, you share /post your items customers view them and purchase them. So displaying your item is big because it attracts buyers. Whether you’re wearing the item or snapping pictures of many creative ideas you can wear the clothes. This give the buyer an image of how the item can be worn. Once you make your first sell you wrap your items and place item in a priority mail box (which are free at the post office ) then Posh Mark sends you a shipping label…you print the label and take item to post office. You will receive your first payment once the customer receives their item. I wanted to mention that PoshMark does keep a percentage of what you make!! I enjoy this app because it gives me the freedom to make extra cash wherever I go. My closet consist of women’s /men’s /kids clothing and accessories/shoes/and a vintage camera 🙂 . I am also a fast shipper, negotiable, and provide bundle discounts. There’s always an item going on sale in my closet… here is a peek at my closet .. Also in my home page I have the widget where you can access the app and shop my closet  đź™‚ #enjoy #let go of the clutter in your closet #money #happy seller/buyer #give your clothes a new owner #put in love to your display and wrapping :)#open a boutique # make your first sale 

Chapt. 1 The Wait (God,Relationships,Self worth,waiting for Sex)

From my previous post regarding readers goals 2017, I wanted to update you all on the book I started reading THE WAIT. Unfortunately this book only has 9 chapters so I will take a chapter review at a time. Also if you like the review and you’re interested in purchasing the book  I will post the link below. Today was a hectic day for me so as I was waiting for my class to start I sat in my car reading the 1st chapter and let me tell you I am hooked, that I had to keep checking my phone so I don’t miss my night class Lol. So let’s get to the review!!!  Chapter 1 title is called NO SEX? You Can’t Be Serious. This chapter is very intense because chapt. 1 is a self evaluation about your sex/relationship life. This chapt. provides you a insight of how to have the faith and ways you can be celibate with your partner . That there is more to a relationship than just feeling instant gratification. Once we give ourselves the love and care we need, we are able to flourish in our sex/ relationship life. We learn patience and how being selective of our choices makes us more desirable.

2017 Readers Goal 

I’m not your loyal bookworm, but I’m trying to get my read on this year. My goal is to finish these 4 books by the end of the year. Every 5th chapter I will write a brief summary of what I learned. In hopes to get you all reading as well. It’s always refreshing to escape in a good book next to a cup of tea (Earl Grey Latte ) and warm blankets :). Let me know any best sellers or your favorites?

One Month Postpartum Body 

Today marks my one month postpartum. Body wise I am feeling great! I’ve been taking care of my body since I gave birth. I am making sure I drink my superhuman juice and eat a balance meal. I wanted to share, even though I am not at my ideal weight I really progressed during this month. My pregnancy weight was 160 now it’s 135. I feel very comfortable. I am still breastfeeding which helps you burn 500 calories a day. I am always running around with my boys which increases my activity. I wanted to share a picture,because I feel proud and I know it’s not where I want to be , but this body is still a work in progress. Tip: many pregnant woman develop stretchmarks, I wanted to share a cream that I’ve used throughout both of my pregnancies. As you can see it prevented me from developing stretchmarks. (Used twice a day ) ..What also helped me was to drink plenty of water and also consumed foods rich in vitamin E and C. Here is the link where I purchase my cream. Also Amazon is where I purchased my sweet sweat belly band and my waist trainer.

 http://m.fairhavenhealth.com

Miscarriage (my aching heart)

 

Miscarriage is a word no future mother wants to hear or even think about. I was about 19 years old and newlywed.  My husband always wanted children and I didn’t think about how soon a child could come.  A few weeks past after our honeymoon and I realized my menstrual cycle was late. I figured, I am just late and It will come in a day or two. Soon after I noticed pregnancy symptoms and I knew I had to take a pregnancy test. I took a few tests and yes!! It was positive, I went to see the Dr. a week later. I was very anxious since I didn’t know what to expect. I met with my Dr. and he confirmed my pregnancy, but also mention that he was not able to spot the baby (embryo). He stated it might be too early in my pregnancy to see anything, I figured it was normal. My husband and I moved to a different state that same week. Once I got there I searched for a new OBGYN Dr. my 1st apt was set for me. I went in and once again the Dr. confirmed my pregnancy and provided me with an ultrasound( baby picture). I was excited and called my mom to confirm my pregnancy. My mother was delighted knowing she will be a grandma for the first time. During the following weeks, my family would call me to check if I was doing good.  At that time, I was missing them since they couldn’t be here physically to share these moments together. A few weeks past and I was around 12 weeks and that’s where my nightmare started. I remember that exact day, I woke up to use the restroom like usual and I noticed blood on my underwear. I immediately got concerned and contacted my neighbor and she took me to the emergency room. I waited patiently to be called in and waited for my husband to arrive. Once I was called in by the Dr.  and my husband arrived (a few minutes later).  The Dr. wheeled me into a room where they performed another ultrasound and checked my cervix. Unfortunately, the look on the doctor’s face said it all. Dr.  sat down and regrettably looked into my eyes and stated the discomforting news. I immediately lost all hope and laid on the hospital bed with tears falling down my face. I couldn’t bear the fact that I was in this situation. My husband tried to comfort me, but not even my husband could comfort me during this moment. I felt so empty and full of sadness. I asked the Dr. how could this be possible since I was talking care of myself. She stated that I didn’t do anything wrong that sometimes our bodies do not take the pregnancy well. She then stated that I would go back home and have my miscarriage there and if I felt like the contractions were excessively painful to return to the emergency room.  As she went to go obtain my discharge paperwork a social worker arrived. She wanted to make sure that I had support during this difficult time. She reassures me what the Dr. previously stated. She provided words of comfort and advice.  As she left my husband and I were in a cold hospital room where we received the worst news of our lives.  We both felt alone at that moment. I thought to myself how much I wanted this pregnancy to be and how happy I would have been holding my child. Once we left the hospital it was already dark and I knew once I got home it wasn’t over. As I slowly walked into our apartment,  I went into the walk-in closet where I was going to go change my blood-stained pants. As I was searching for a new pair I felt a painful contraction that brought me down to my knees. I felt like crying, but with all that crying at the hospital I had no more tears left .   All I felt was the contractions hitting me one by one. I got myself up and rushed to the restroom where I sat on the toilet. I was in such pain that my husband didn’t know what to say or do. As I sat down I watched all the blood clots drip down I was scared because I never seen so much blood before. I had so many emotions that day, I just wanted the day to be over. I didn’t sleep the whole night, all I did was lay on my bed holding my stomach wishing this was just a dream. The next day I went back to the Dr where she cleaned me up and sent me back home. During the same week my family was calling me to check how I was doing. I couldn’t bear to tell them the sad news specially my mother. I didn’t want her to feel guilty because she was not able to comfort me. So, I ignore the calls for a few days till I got the courage to advised them of what went on. My mother cried with me and said if I was OK. I wasn’t because I felt so guilty, alone , and hollow. I didn’t realize how much this miscarriage would affect my life. During my both pregnancies that I had, it was always in the back of my mind. Miscarriages is something that people don’t really speak about, but till this day my heart still aches, yes, I love life and find the positive in it. But every October I remember my little angel. October 2010 the day you left this world. The day my heart broke. The day I lost a part of me. You’re my missing puzzle piece and I know one day will be complete, but for now mommy has your brothers they are wonderful and I am sure you would have been just as delightful as they are.  You’re always in my thoughts and my heart love Mom !!<3

 

 

 

A letter to a immigrant mom

As Donald Trump takes the Oath of office on January 20th, 2017, I can’t help but look back at my life and see how much freedom I have as a U.S. citizen. Unfortunately 20 million immigrants can’t say the same thing including my mother. My mother came to the U.S in the 1980’s with my father. Just two young adults experiencing the level of opportunities our country has to offer. Once they got here only she knew she wanted to settle and create a family. Sadly life happens and things don’t turn out picture perfect. My mother and father wanted different things in life. My father wanted to live in Mexico where he had his life already established, so my mom moved back to Mexico with him after she had me. She supported his dreams and help him get through school. Soon after she was still missing this beloved country and knew she didn’t belong in Mexico where opportunities were limited. She crossed the border back and forth to give birth to my other two younger sisters. Pregnant and all she crossed, her words ” I remember when I was pregnant with one of your sisters we spend the night in the dessert it was one of the coldest nights I’ve ever experience. I thought god please give me the strength so survive this night. The cold went right through my bones. It was unimaginable I could only hold my stomach to protect myself and my unborn child.” As a daughter I could only hold her and think silently the amount of courage she had to do what she did. Once she gave birth to us three girls she decided my goal is to raise my daughters in a country where they would gain education and be valued. She ended up separating from my father due to her moving back and other personal reasons. I remember that day like if it was yesterday. She packed our clothes silently and whisper in our ears to get ready. She already had food set up for our trip to the U.S .We gather just the minimal as kids we couldn’t even take our toys just necessities. We took the greyhound bus where we slept for two or three days. I remember watching my mom always awake, making sure her daughters were safe.  She was going to meet one of our aunts at the Tijuana border where my sisters and I crossed with our birth certificates. Since she is an immigrant she was left behind. I recall my mother saying ” girls, I am unable to go with you I have to take a different route. Please listen to your aunt and behave. I will be with you girls in a few days.” My mother gave us each a hug and said she loved us. It was one of the warmest hugs I ever had from her. The look on my moms face as she was leaving us was so traumatic for me. Her whole presence that day, so many mixed emotions that we didn’t even know what to do. We left in my aunts white old school Toyota, as my sisters and I sat in the vehicle as it left we all kept staring at my mom till she was no longer there. I felt so numb that day , tears couldn’t come out from my eyes. I didn’t see my mother after that till she crossed the border a few days later. For my sisters and I , it felt like months. Once she got us at my aunts house where we were living. My mother knew she had to build her life with us. She started looking for employment and a room to rent. It didn’t take her long to settle. We had our room and she found employment at the strawberry fields where she worked there for a few years. My mother save so much that she was able to purchase her home in 3 years since coming into this country. My mother was so happy she was able to provide us with a great quality of life after all the hardships we went through. Fast forward a few years she changed employment and sold her 1st house and upgraded to a bigger home. My sisters and I grew up and became adults. We all graduated from High School. Thanks to my moms sacrifices I have a career in the medical field and still furthering my education by majoring as a Radiologic Technologist, the middle sister is currently attending FIDM majoring visual communications, lastly the younger one is attending Cal State Fullerton majoring in American Studies and Minoring in Political Science. My mother words ” I will continue to provide and protect my girls because you girls are the future ” Please keep in mind this didn’t happen over night, this was a sacrifice my single mother made. She paid taxes, paid her families insurance, received no government help what so ever, She paid our childcare, she paid her own groceries, all with her minimal wage check. Nothing was given to her. So as I type this story I think about all the other immigrants and say you’re not alone. We all made sacrifices, we all have our stories. Now as I think about Donald Trump , I really hope he see’s the good in us because we are not bad apples. We love this country and this country is made of so many immigrants from different parts of the world. So have some love and think how you can better this country without pushing us down.

And to my mom thank you for your bravery, faith, and love.

God thank you for guiding her ……

Your Own Happiness (I am in control )

What does self love mean to you? Many of us around the world are living in such a hectic lifestyle that we forget to take care of our mind, body, and souls. Each individual is so unique and brings such sparkle in each of our hearts. We have to make our self a priority even though its hard. What ever goal you have set yourself you are worth of accomplishing. Even if it means releasing what no longer serves you. Many people have a difficult time giving themselves that love either because they are in a very complex situation but guess what who isn’t or who hasn’t gone through any hardships in their lives???  Its your attitude that changes the situation,  your positive decisions that helps define the future that you wish for. Weather its leaving a boyfriend, Making changes in your health, Being better for your kids, Getting your education no matter your age, Finding a job, Forgiving someone who has hurt you. You can be in such a dark hole thinking you wont get out of it. Let me break it to you find your worth, the mind and heart are so powerful and you are in control. Just like a car it doesn’t function if you don’t maintain it. Your car doesn’t drive itself or does it? You are in control of the wheel you decide your destination. Do what makes you smile. Do what makes you laugh. Love yourself 1st before you love others. Let go and forgive, don’t carry burdens. Positive vibes my friends and LOVE LOVE LOVE specially in this world that we live in. Don’t worry because worrying about things that you can’t control wont lead you anywhere. Just a little love from friend to friend …(PEP TALK) Tip : I usually look at myself in the mirror and tell myself I am love, I will be a better me than I was yesterday, I will continue to grow and heal my wounds, I will not let others get the best of me, I will dream big and work hard. I will care for my health.selflove

Potty training nightmares 

Am I the only mom with a three year old who knows where pee and poo poo go  but refuses to use the toilet. Well welcome to my world. As I was pregnant with Evan I took some time off work due to medical reasons and to spend more quality time before Evan arrives. So I figured well this is a great time to teach him how to potty train. Eli learned quick going pee pee in the toilet , but when it came to poop he refused to sit down on the toilet. I tried everything you name it even buying him his favorite big boy underwear. I heard so many suggestions and nothing has worked. People told me to sit him down on the toilet every hour. Check when he usually goes poop. Do a potty training chart and provide goodies for him once he meets his goal. Well I understand every child is different but my Eli is making me crazy lol. So far it’s been even more hard to keep on track because since Evan arrived Eli has stopped going pee in the toilet he refuses to go. Maybe he wants more attention since he used to be the only child. Or he is scared to get sucked into the toilet. Whatever it is I’m here to provide the best support for my boy and keep trying these crazy ideas hoping one will work.  Eli will start preschool and they help children potty train. As a mom who is going back to work this is a blessing but also knowing to work as hard to potty train your child at home. ***WARNING*** I’ve read in articles that spanking your kid while he is in the process of potty training is not good why? Because it creates more fear for the child. So please parents be patient because sooner or later you’re child will advance..EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT 🙂